Tengah Malam

Dalam segala pundek celaka yang aku hadap sekarang,
a conversation with her last night was the best ever,
seronok bercerita eh semalam Jaja?
its been a while since i haven't listen to any sincere laugh,
my life was miserable now,
tapi aku bisa temu bibit manis dalam sesi tengah malam semalam,
entah, cinta mungkin sudah tidak layak untuk orang kayak aku,
dunia kita beda yang amat,
kau gadis manis yang jauh nya berjalan jauh tinggal aku dibelakang,
akhir kali kita ketemu didalam gig rock&roll kugiran feveret kita,
aku scroll media sosial dan kau bersama teman2 yang pernah jadi teman aku,
ah ini bukan apa-apa cuba conversation tengah malam.
dan mungkin...

dan kau sekarang dalam kereta sedang senyum melihat langit pagi,
dan tangan mu digenggam erat penuh kasih dari seorang laki-laki yang aku mungkin kenal.
moga aku mampu teruskan dan habis kan semua sekali,
tetap coba.

We at the beach on a cloudy day, just men and woman having a conversation, the wave was so high that day, look like the storm is coming....
we just sit at the high bay,the wind just so gale,her eyes focus at those ocean.

"hey,theres a blue whale there!" she said,
"its so fucking huge do.... ada dua! mesti jantan betina"

The view was so gigantic,

"awan pun mendung macam nak ribut ni..."
"rasanya lah, ah takpe lah ramai lagi orang kat sini,Fiq look at the sea, i think its to deep sampai dari biru jadi hijau"
"Rasa kita boleh berenang tak ?"
"Tak rasanya, tapi sebelum sampai sini i see a beach kat situ ada orang mandi,hey! theres a walrus"
She hold my arm,
"woa that fucking hugeeee....... (With joy at her face) Fiq apa beza walrus dengan sea lion?" asking with a cute little smile at her face... ,

"walrus kot mesti lah besar,kalau kecik tu sea lion,and walrus ada taring..."
"ohhhhhhh i see.... (tease my nose) so buat apa for living?"
"bikin filem,tangkap gambar"
"ohhh... btw i,m a actor my self"
"alah tak payah bagitau dah kenal.i love ur film"
"ohh thanks fiq such a plesure"

We walk along the bay,just enjoy the oceanic view,its cute when she to clumsy repairing her short hair while those wind hit her face,

Oh! she wearing a yellowish blouse,white high cut chuck taylor,without any makeup at her face,and beautiful smile that i ever see....
theres to many people at the bay...
and they were looking at us with curious face, and the wind getting to strong,

"Afiq, look like its raining here,jom cari tempat berteduh the storm is coming i think"

I pick her hand and we run along the bay,and while running her calling my name...

"Afiq!afiq!"
"yee? "
"agak-agak kalau tsunami,kita dekat jurang yang tinggi mcm ni we gonna die tak?"
"haishh mengarut, but if we gonna die,im dying happy la kot"
"kenapa pulak?"
"sebab i can finally meet someone like you at the end of my life"
"sweet talker dasar lelaki!"
"hey i,m not"
"Dah nanti cerita penat nak cakap masa lari"
"you calling me first senorita!"

Finally we found a jetty with shelter,theres a kid inside the shelter, a little girl with wet shirt..its heavy rain out there and the shelter door was broken and got to many hole, i search for a huge zink and cover up the door.

"Adik dari mana?" she asking,
that girl just dont speak any word and she look hungry,
i take out a pack of biscuit from my bag luckly i have one and it does't wet.
"nah"
She take my biscuit,go to right corner of our shelter,begin to eat her biscuit, we both smile...


i take a sit beside a window,that window facing a beach,the ocean just like want to unleash a kraken, so full of rage luckly out shelter quiet far from the beach....
she pull out a chair and sit infront of me,

"May i?"
"Duduk lah"
"Afiq,sometime love can come in a simplest way kan?"
"Macam?"
"Macam sit here inside a random shelter looking a ur hazel eye?"
"this is love?"
"i guess so...... or maybe its me?"
"look, i feel theres a weird feeling between us tapi....."
"Hey look the rain is stop,jom pergi pantai!"

I remove the zink that cover up the door,that little girl running out,meet her friend at the fisher boat they were waiting for their father i think.

I pull out my shoes,put beside the door and walking toward beach,from behind she pull my hand, with her cute smile and i just letting her doing that, it feel so warm inside,weird feeling that make my heart pounding so hard...

We walk along the beach with her holding my arm tight,the sun coming out and that yellowish evening ray shine at her face, god....... that was the most beautiful thing that i ever see...

"hey how about you became my actor in my next short film?"
"heh, not a big deal"
"Tapi takde payment tau?"
"its okay la dengan you kot"
"hey..."
"What afiq?"

I pull her, i kiss her......
her lips was sweet, her face was so red, she close her eye but i can feel a tight hug from her,feel her finger play with my hair, its so warm....




*Tersentak

Shit it was a dream.

If i can be happy at my dream oh god please dont wake me up.....

hey there!
its been a while since i haven't write anything,
well, im busy.... tired..... hibernation..... so much happen this year, so much!
it takes one year and finally i can stand by myself, finding myself again,
i meet new people,nice people, passionate people,
you know what... i actually really miss those friend that i been leaving behind,
i miss to laugh with them, theres no regret just i miss em so much,
do scrazy shit, deep talk,midnight drive away, those epic road trip,


Aha! there's one trip i remember,after khottal gig we overnight,
pio drive us for sun rise, i was asleep along the road,
7am pio wake me up and i swear that was the most beautiful place that i ever been,
at some kebun nenas,
i stepout from Pio car,
walking along the small road, dirty2 one, and i scream...
I,M THE KING OF THE WORLD,
pio and boo smiling and said
"woi kang anjing owner kebun kejor kau nk lari mana ?dah gemuk!"

Just laughing at the time,
ya know,
i am a dreamer,always shared my dream to them,
i want to open up an art cafe,
make a good film about our friendship,
i want to live to the fullest,
and they shared their story to,
travel the world.
buy a caravan,
i miss them so much,
well growing up was suck, everyone was busy,
shima going to start her euro trip soon (damn that girls!) haha
kidd still at cardiff the one who calling me at 4am just for mamak session,
Milla tina at aussie for her study,we never meet before but seriously she was a true friend,
barely talk but always been there for me.
Boo with her work,she quiet busy but if we talk, we can borak all day long,
Adib still at dunggun being a good student and lover, ahhhhh! the handsome one to, always like a gandalf and i,m a bilbo baggins, haha... mean but reasonable.
pio with his passion, theres always a good story to tell if i meet him,
herry was a great friend and i always look him as my own brother, with his nigga accent everytime we hang out,
ziela with her new work, being a office worker i hope she was happy with dinie,
theres to many actualy, Jun,Aidil,Nana,Naddy,sems,amy,Iyka so much! and i miss them a lot!

thanks for those past few years,it was a great journey with you guys, broke but we were so fucking happy!
Hope we can meet soon just for a cup of Mocha and....A conversation.



PS* Grammar nazi fuck you!

malam-malam yang lepas,
malam yang aku keluar ngopi kerna mau escape dari ingat kamu,
keluar malam, pulang pagi,
kaluar malam, pulang pagi,
ironi diluar pun mulut aku ngak pernah bisa berhenti sebut nama kamu depan teman-teman,
cuba keluar,
cuba rentap hati sendiri,
aku tetap aja ngak bisa keluar dari perasaan rindu kamu,
rindu yang berduri,
kangen yang menyepi,

the past few week,
i,ve been lost my self,
im so mad at you,
everything seem fade away,
our morning conversation,
our joke seem not fun like it use to,
its hurt me the fact that i miss you every single night and what remind me of yours was our lil cute conversation,
its not yours,
its me who screw up everything,




and i was get ready to get hurt again,
cause i know you will be with him this fucking weekend.

Todavía creo

after all those year i've been knowing you, 

hanging out with you, 

shared those silly story with you, 

and i dont feel that i've been knowing you, 

your true you, devil inside you, 

you know what,

sometime i feel you were heartless bitch who laughing for others misery, 

sometime you were the most loving person that i known, 

sometime you were sweet, 

sometime you were pathetic, 

sometime i've been thingking that you should be with me since i,m the one who understand you so well, (perasan sial) 

what you love and hate, 

what make you smile, 

you were so young, 

not wiser enough 

stuborn bitch, 

stupid gila sometime, 

full of scar and flaws, 

fucking anoying motherfucker, 

but 

you were sincere in everything, 

you make other feel warm with your heart, 

you willing to sacrifice for others, 

cutest person that i ever know,

in two,three or five years i will be reading this blog post before proposing to you to be my wife, 

will ya? haha. 

Siga adelante

Orang kata, 

"make the last chapter of 2014 the best chapter" 

so far this year was okay, even i lost some close friend, 

my life actually pretty good, i've been travel to so many place, 

meet new people, even dah ada yang jadi kawan, 

many good gig happen this year, Tapau fest,GEGO2014, 

its been a hectic year,

Tapi tadi, i scroll my garis masa, 

aku 

lihat 

dia 

dengan 

dia 

bergambar 

mesra 

gila. 

aku terus rasa tahun ni macam hambar gila. 

MOVE ON BODOH!